Tomorrow I will turn 42. It’s a new day. I figured I should post something about the new age of ME. 42 year old me needs to focus on my life. I need to focus on my little family and my horses, dogs etc. I need to realize that others won’t understand where I am at in my life. See, when I turned 40, I didn’t realize how life had caught up with me. Now, I get it.
So my new thinking is simple. I have simple goals. I have simple thoughts. I tend to complicate them with emotions. When it comes to my horses, it is really hard to realize that we have aged! Where did time go? My focus has changed to now. Not later. Now. What do I want to do now?
I currently am thinking about the 2 day race this weekend. In reality, it’s gonna be a mess. Then got more entries than ever before! This puts my draw number later in the day than I would like. What to do? Well, I want to run both days. My body has decide that running at 9pm does not allow me to drive 2 hours home. How does this change me? Well, if I can’t run till late (after 7pm) and I can sleep in my trailer….. why not sleep then drive home? In the past, before 40, I would drive the two hours home and call it good. Now that I have reached a new level in life, why drive home in the dark?
This is a new thought process for me! I used to burn the midnight oil! But now, I don’t see well in the dark. I’m not in a rush. I feel safety is more important than speed. I value the all mighty dollar for those entry fees more than the drive home. I think I realize that my life is worth more than it was before. So what will I do? I don’t know.
In all fairness, I have a child and a loving husband that worry about safety. I need to respect that. I need to analyze the situation and do what is best. In my 20’s it would have been a no brainer. Drive home. Now that I’m in my 40’s I have to think it out. Maybe it’s self preservation? I dont know! But time changes everything!
So I forgot to hit post when I created this blog post…..and I will tell you what I did! I stayed one more night! I made two runs on Lynx! We won a nice check placing 2nd in the 3D with some stiff competition! On the way to the race, My New To Me truck decided to be weird. Her clutch began to slip. I had to pull off on the shoulder of a busy road to find a gear that would stick! Lucky for me, I left in PLENTY of time! I managed to get to the race with in a couple of hours of leaving home. I also was able to park by my favorite cluster of oak trees! It all worked out! On the way home, on Monday, my truck drove just fine. We made it safely home by noon!
Looking back, the decision was easier than I thought! God gave me a little push. He said “listen to ME.” And so I did! I truly enjoyed my weekend and getting to share prayers and stories with a lot of people whom I didn’t know. Some, I did know. Sharing God’s love and blessings with my fellow barrel racers was such an amazing feeling! Being able to spend time with my horse and my dog was priceless!
When someone says if you were not scared, you didn’t go fast enough, believe them!! Lynx was on FIRE! I feel truly blessed!